Thursday, November 21, 2013 – Day 14: Love Takes Delight
In the world today, we are constantly bombarded with what is attractive and what is not. We’re constantly trying to attain these unattainable standards. But if we embrace these standards of beauty, we will spend our entire lives discontent with our appearance, and even wishing our significant other may look more like what we see in magazines or in the movies. Fortunately, we have the ability to choose for ourselves what we find to be attractive and appealing to us. We can make the choice to find delight in the person we are with.
It is important to learn to lead your heart. When you’re newlywed, your love is strong for one another. Now that newlywed stage may have passed, but you can still have something as strong as that young, new love. But you need to make the decision to find delight in your spouse and to show them love, no matter how many years you’ve been married. It all starts with the choice to love.
We need to make the choice to view the person we are with as unique and to enjoy that uniqueness. We need to remember the reasons we fell in love with them. We need to strive to seek their companionship, desire their conversation. We need to learn to make place for them again in our hearts. You have the ability to control how you feel and respond to your spouse…so make the choice to delight in them again. It’s important to try and rekindle that initial spark that was lit between the two of you. Laugh and flirt again. Take the responsibility upon yourself to relearn what it is you love about your spouse and why you promised them ‘forever’.
The dare for day 14:
Questions for pondering: What did you decide to give up? What did you do together? How did it go? What new thing did you learn (or relearn) about your spouse?
Well today was a really crazy busy day for us. We both left work early to go to an appointment together and then had our first couple’s therapy session at 5. So the opportunity didn’t really present itself for any big events to take place to do anything special. However, after our appointment, we spent a while talking because I could tell that something we discussed in our session was weighing on Scott’s mind. I had thought of trying to squeeze in a work out when I got home if it was early enough, but decided to give my time to Scott to talk and listen to him voice his concerns. My marriage and being present for Scott means more to me than fitting in a workout. I’ve learned to switch my priorities.
Our first session did go really well, though. I think our therapist is going to be a perfect fit for us. There’s something about her I really love and we both felt comfortable with her right off the bat, so I’m really optimistic about working with her.
Also, today I had to spill the beans to Scott about next week’s surprise trip to South Carolina. The football game was a night game, instead of an afternoon game, which meant we won’t get back home until really late on Sunday…so I had to let him know so he could take off of work Monday if he felt it was necessary. Anyway, he was SO excited and SO happy and SO surprised! It felt really good to make him that happy and to surprise him like that. 🙂 So now we can plan all the details out together!
Day 14 down, 26 to go!