Tuesday, November 26, 2013 – Day Nineteen: Love is Impossible
No matter how hard you try, you will not be able to form unconditional love (or, agape love) out of your own imperfect heart. It’s beyond our ability and our capabilities. We may think that with enough time, hard work and dedication, we will be able to cultivate a lifelong, sacrificial love all on our own. We may be able to learn to be patient, to be more thoughtful and understanding than we once were, yet to fully love someone unselfishly and unconditionally is a completely different story.
We may have tried to act in love with our spouse before. Yet no matter how hard we try, we still overreact, we still think judgmentally, or have unkind thoughts. How often have you been unable to swallow your pride and apologize, or forgive the other person fully? We all have hard times with these and other areas. It’s human nature. We’re all imperfect.
The Love Dare mentioned that if we are personally not in a good relationship with God, we will never be able to fully love our spouse, because it’s from God that that love develops. For as long as we focus on obtaining the love we need from within ourselves, we will never possess it. This section is all about learning to rely on God and reach out with faith to know that we will be able to cultivate that love if we include God in our relationship.
I know I personally have seen that my marriage has done nothing but fall apart and deteriorate by not having God be a part of it, and now that we are both trying to include God in our marriage, things have already started to improve greatly. The section ended with this thought: “You cannot live without Him and you cannot love without Him. There is no telling what he could do in your marriage if you choose to put your trust in him.” So that is exactly what we’re doing.
Dare for day 19:
Questions for pondering: What do you believe God is saying to you? Is there a stirring in your heart? What decision have you made in response to this?
I definitely see each of these dares as something that isn’t just a ‘one time thing’ and then you move on. Each of these dares are things that need to be utilized and done on a regular basis in order for a marriage to flourish. I know my tendencies and I know just how hard it can be to apply these things on a daily basis. That’s where it will help to have God be a part of our relationship. I’ll learn to find the strength and ability (slowly, but surely) to be able to utilize these valuable lessons in my relationship with Scott on a regular, ongoing basis.
I know that the door has been opened up to me, and to both of us, to grow closer together now and to really make God be a part of our lives together. We both just need to keep that as the focal point going forward and I truly think we can learn to be a successful and happy couple.
Day 19 down, 21 to go!
I regret to say this will be my last post of this kind for a few days now. I will be going out of town with Scott (:D) for the long weekend. But don’t think I’m giving up on The Love Dare! I will be actively knocking each day off while we’re gone. Hopefully (if I can) I will try and do a recap when I get back home of all the dares I did while I was gone!